Are You Ready To Be a Mentor?

This article was originally featured in Inc.com.

How to nurture talent throughout your organization.

Early in my career I received advice from a mentor that made me think about talent and hiring strategies in a completely different way. It cemented my belief in mentorship as a path to personal and professional development and the impact that talent has on our organizational success.

It all started when my own mentor advised that you should always hire people who are smarter or even better-suited to their roles than you might be.

Wait a minute. Hire people smarter than me? Is that really good advice?

I came to the conversation with the assumption that hiring someone better and smarter would jeopardize my own career. Instead, my mentor suggested, if you consistently demonstrate that you can attract and recruit strong talent, you'll always have a place in your organization.  

That shift in perspective made me think differently about my role, not just as a manager or team leader, but as a leader within our company. As a result, I've also become a strong advocate for mentorship as a way to develop future leaders within our organization. If you're past the high growth stage of your own career and considering how you might expand your role in your company, consider becoming a mentor.

Formal and informal mentoring

Formal mentoring is a more structured approach that is appropriate for individuals with experience, perspective, and an interest in shepherding someone's career trajectory or personal growth. It's a 1:1 relationship that might last months or even years.  

Informal mentorship, on the other hand, can be episodic and short-lived. If you are in a company without a formal program and you have something that you can give, don't be afraid to extend that offer to someone who could benefit from your guidance. It might be as simple as pulling someone aside with advice or constructive criticism; it can be a moment in time or an ongoing relationship. You don't always have to be in a long term relationship to play the role of the sage. For example, when someone books a meeting with me seeking counsel, I typically ask whether this our first meeting or our last? In other words, is this the start of a series of conversations, or a one-time need for a sounding board or a piece of advice?

At my firm, I'm functionally responsible for our financial and investment strategies, but my mentees come from every function in our organization, from marketing to relationship management. Getting to know and help develop the talent within our company has been as insightful for me as I hope it has been for my mentees, who have expanded my understanding and appreciation for the diversity of thought, opinion, and talent on our team. I strive for the feedback part of my mentoring relationships to be a give and take. Here are my key takeaways about being a mentor.

Make sure you're in the right place to be a good mentor. You might be in a good place to mentor if you're past the high growth stage of your own career and you're interested in giving back from an altruistic perspective. You should be it for your mentee, not for yourself. On the other hand, if you're in a high growth stage, you may be interested in mentoring someone who is on their way up the ladder.

Leave your ego at the door. While you may be senior in role and experience, you're not the most important person in this relationship. Mentoring requires a sincere commitment to developing a person and watching them grow as a person and as a professional.

Get to know the person first. Mentoring is not a one-size-fits-all proposition; not everyone needs the same prescriptive support and guidance. Knowing and understanding your mentee, uncovering their strengths and weaknesses, and getting clear about their goals for the relationship will make you a better mentor. Alignment will result in you helping them to grow strengths and minimize weaknesses, and ultimately, to reach their goals.

Set your expectations for your mentee. The mentee should set the cadence, establish the agenda for your meetings, and drive the relationship in general. Ensure they are accountable at the outset to what they want to accomplish--not just follow your idea of what they should want.

Establish trust by keeping your conversations confidential. Your discretion is key to giving your mentee permission to open up, secure knowing that it's a safe space for them to work through problems they may be encountering.

Be fully present with your mentee. This is their time. Keep your calendar clear, don't be distracted by a pinging phone or computer, and bring your best listening skills.  

Before you jump into "advice" mode, ask probing questions. The urge to immediately come up with solutions will be strong in the beginning, but over time as you become a better listener, you'll ask more questions than you will ultimately answer, helping your mentee think through the issues. Of course, you can always give advice if the situation warrants, but the Socratic method of conversation typically nets more growth and development long term.

Be true to yourself. In my case, I'm a direct person--I tell it like it is, hopefully kindly. Most of my mentees have valued that directness, but it's possible that someone would appreciate a more empathetic approach than mine. You'll be most effective if you are true to yourself.

It's okay to say no. If you don't perceive a fit, and if you don't believe that the mentee will benefit from your particular brand of guidance, it's perfectly okay to say no. Additionally, managers should not formally mentor people on their team, because a mentorship benefit is the opportunity to grow and learn from someone in addition to their supervisor.

Recognize when your work is done. When your meeting cadence slows down, you'll know that your mentee has likely started to develop her own wings and your mentor relationship may be winding down.  

For my firm, mentoring has become a core strategy, an important part of how we think about the next generation of leadership. Beyond the benefit to the company, I find that I am gratified by being a mentor. Paying it forward is a great way to recognize that I didn't get to be where I am on my own.

If you'd like to read more about mentorship, I recommend you check out this piece in The Wall Street Journal: Are Superstar Employees Worth It?

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